Thursday, May 8, 2008

I aint gonna lie.

I'm freaking out right now.

After some careful evaluation I see that if I work my ass off for the next year and a half I will complete my degree by March of 2010.

MARCH 2010.

I realize this isn't that far away, but in my mind this feels like a big committment. I've know this all along, but to see it mapped out on a page really brings it home. The school committment doesn't bother me as much as just the life committment. What this actually means is that until March 2010 I will be sitting in this chair, and writing a blog that reads strikingly similar to the one you've been reading. I will probably still be riding my bike to work in the morning and complaining about the cold and then the hot. I will be drinking the same coffee from either home or my "easy easy" lady at Dunkin' Donuts. I will also still have my crazy landlady and still have most of the same furniture and clothing because frankly, I wont have the money to buy new. I will probably be a bit smarter, but yea... it all seems daunting.

Maybe I can find a way to actually be out of debt.
Maybe it is March 2010 that I will have a new degree, a new knowledge set, and fiscal freedom? Maybe I will also be terrifically fit and disciplined in my life style.

I mean really, I should see this as an opportunity to dig in and get things right. That is the difference between being in school and in real life, you know? You set times on yourself when you're in school. You constantly adhering to deadlines and although we do that some in real life it is not the same so maybe I should embrace the deadline. Suck it up and get it done, Davin.

It just scares me.
I know no decisions are permanent, but you can't get your time back and so that's why I feel nervous about it.

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